Five Bowls

Five bowls, not six. Before, there were six. Now, there are five.

Peri, Mayor of Long Beach, King of the Beach, has crossed the Rainbow Bridge.

There are 5 bowls. It sounds like so many, but my truth is it seems like "only," not "many."

If you met Peri, you knew that he was special. We will agree that ALL animals are special, but sometimes you meet a wise one, an elder shall we say. That was Peri. I think animals are here on Earth to be our teachers. They are here to give us messages, to show us joy, love, compassion. Whether we choose to listen, well that's our personal choice.

Animals live in the present moment, there is no yesterday, no tomorrow, but there IS a now. They don't have the static in their lives that people do, they have the gift of clarity. Peri was always about the people. I think a lot about what was Peri's "job" and it comes down to 2 things. To bring love wherever he goes, and to unite people. He was excellent at both.

I've been thinking, what would I do if I knew today was the last day of my life, how would I spend it? Would I panic, and waste every moment wondering why was this the last day of my life, or instead, could I approach life, my day, THAT day, as Peri did?

How did Peri approach life? Well, pretty much just like the last full day of his life.... with absolute joy. Peri was continually fully in the present moment. He was not one to let an opportunity pass. In addition to that, he couldn't get enough adoration and worshipping, this is an absolute fact. If he wasn't getting what he needed, he'd simply move on to the next person waiting in a lounge chair, walking down the beach, or where ever else someone would be.

I remember a few years ago we had a commercial shoot here. I forget what it was for because through the years we've had several shot here for different things. This was a big shoot, trailers rolled up with actors, wardrobe changes, huge cameras and all that went with that stuff. Of course Peri had to check it ALL out. It was absolutely hilarious watching the antics going on as they were shooting scene after scene, while Peri would photo-bomb the whole thing. In the end, we had to pick him up and remove him from the equation (time is money in commercial shooting so we learned). Of course, he did win the hearts of those involved with the shoot anyway. Teeny paw prints in the fresh raked sand between takes.

Back to the "last day" thoughts. Peri, on what turned out to be one of the last days of his life was taken for a beach walk on his leash. Not unusual, we made our best effort to get him out there every day. He was thrilled as always, just like it was his first time out there. He would skittle down the steps (we had to move quickly to keep up!) sniff around the deck, then head left so he could scratch "his" rope. Next, he'd decide if he would go more left or right. To the left, his favorite patch of sea oats, to the right his favorite patch of blue flowers. That day, he turned right.... he went to the seaweed and sniffed, then flopped down making himself as long as possible and soaked up every ray of sunshine he could grab. After enough of that, he got up and began his stroll down beach. To a beach chair... sniff sniff, lay down, sprawl and soak. Up on the move again.... to the small sea oat patch on the right.... sniff sniff... then getting down low and sneaking inside them so he couldn't be seen (except for the leash leading into this spot, so cute!) Next thing I knew, he was on the move again....to his blue flowers. The blue flowers weren't blooming, but, there he went into the large, green unblooming patch anyway. Flop, right in the middle of them. His nose went up in the air to smell.... the sea, the sand, the sky. He watched birds nearby and made 2 halfhearted (still leashed) lunges for them. Did the same with some butterflies nearby. He got up and walked onto the sand towards the seaweed. He didn't go to the weed line, instead he stopped shy of there. He sat down, all regal. He stared at the ocean. He sniffed, and looked at the beautiful sky, then back to the sea. He just stared at his ocean after that, like he was surveying everything, that everything was his, and he was everything. He was connected, fully present. Looking back now, I think he knew his time was short, a secret he wouldn't reveal. If only we had known, what would we have done differently? I suppose nothing realistically, but I do imagine that I'd never have fallen asleep, so I would never miss another moment with him for whatever time was left.

Peri, in "his" blue flower patch, at a time when they were blooming.

I celebrated the miracle of Peri with every breath. He had this "thing" he would do with me every morning. As soon as he knew I was awake, he would stride up to the top of my pillow, and do a combination of sniffing and purring on me that made such a unique sound. It would only be that moment every day, never going to sleep, never relaxing, nothing else.... just that very moment when he first noticed my open eyes. Sometimes after the sniff/purr he would spin around a few times to get comfy and plop down, other days he would stroll to the edge of the bed, jump down and meow. The message was clear on those days "get up, I want something." And, so I would.

The mornings Peri would plop down were dangerous. I would touch his soft fur, breathe in his familiar smell, and just be with him. The other happy vegan would come in sometimes 2 or 3 times trying to drag me up to work.... time to make muffins, flip pancakes, saute vegetables, or some other task required as an innkeeper. It was hard to leave him there, happy and purring. Content. In the present moment. Telling me to be and do the same.... to follow his lead.

Today I am living a present moment with only 5 bowls. All those sayings "he's in your heart" yes, I know, and I say them too. But, he's not. I cannot touch his fur, hear his rumbling, watch his play, or be with him.

If someone were to ask me, I would describe Peri as fearless, fierce, honest, outspoken, devoted, loving, graceful, persistent, classy, elegant and wise. He knew what he wanted, and knew how to get it. There was no language barrier with Peri, he taught all of us Peri-speak. He wanted to experience as much as he could. He was a sun-worshipper to the very end, loved to eat, loved to play, and loved staying up all night during full moons. He loved to sleep in the hammock, make new friends, break down barriers, and do his best to teach those he could how to live simply, with gratitude in one's heart. Despite all that good, he was never one to back down from a fight (he defended his territory without fail, I even saw him tangle with a snake once -- non poisonous, yup the snake retreated). He was a warrior, and knew how to defend all that was his.

There is such a hole in my heart that it is a physical pain. I will never forget Peri, anyone who knew him could never forget him either.

Sometimes out of the corner of my eye, I think I still see him. If only.

As I feed the 5, I am silently counting for 6.

Rest in peace Peri. Mayor of Long Beach. King of the beach.

Peri, King of the Beach.

A Love Story, of sorts

Then.

Now.

Happy Valentines Day (if that's your thing).

Today IS indeed Valentines Day. This holiday certainly has some sketchy (and apparently bloody!), beginnings, yet it's morphed into a retailers dream (or a consumer's nightmare, depending which side of things you're on).

I've never been a fan of this holiday. I sometimes was alone and made to feel lonely, that perhaps I was damaged or broken since I was not sharing my life (or even a pizza) with someone on February the 14th. Not all years were like that, and now I feel happy to help make special memories for people who come here to celebrate the ordinary, the extra-ordinary and holidays in their lives.

But, where am I going with all this? To a love story, of course.

Love comes in many forms, and creeps up when least expected. What, and who, we devote ourselves to is the single most personal choice we will make in our lives (I think). It may change though the years with who we are with, or what we allow ourselves to grow into, but love stories will always exist.

It has been said that animals do not love us, they fall IN love with us. I believe it. I also think it's reciprocated more than humans will admit, that we too fall in love with our animals.

I have shared my life with animals since I was pretty small. The first cat I remember as a pet was a tiny black cat named Ely. I don't remember much about Ely, he used to hide under our house by crawling into an access hole under a porch. He would come out for dinner, but he didn't really want to be around me, or anyone else. In spite of all that, I adored him, and was completely infatuated with him. He was one of a laundry list of animals that have come and gone in and out of my life.

In 2014, I fell in love with a speck of fur now famously known as Princess Glitter FancyPants. I have written about how she showed up here one night almost exactly 1 year ago. How she was howling so loudly that her cries woke me up in the middle of the night (she outside, me inside). I wrote about how when I went outside to see what was wrong, why was a cat crying in the middle of the night, how she jumped off the ground into my arms (no easy feat considering how tiny she is) and how she was so gnarled with matted fur my first thought was that she was covered in tumors. Underweight. Filthy. Crying. Hungry. Thirsty. Desperate. That's how I found her. What I thought would only be a bowl of food and some comfort has turned out to be another of the great loves in my life.

Princess was thrown away. I know it, the other happy vegan knows it, our vet knows it, and the person who did it knows it. How horrible that people do such terrible deeds to the innocents of the world. She probably endured some pretty big hardships and has some pretty big secrets. Despite this, she was quick to trust me, and fall in love with me. Both she and I were in deep, all too quickly.

She is smart, quick witted, agile, determined, loving, comforting, curious, funny and kind. She is one of the most stubborn cats I've ever known. She has one of the softest coats on any animal I've ever felt, and is the first cat with long hair I've ever known too. It's hilarious watching her as she grooms, her fur is so long she tries to back up from it as she cleans.

That little speck of fur has changed my life and over the last 11 months been a driving force in my life as I continue to evaluate how is the best way for me to be an advocate for animals.

With this little speck of fur, I have surrendered to complete unconditional love. I am very patient with her, and I do my best to imagine what goes through her head to understand her complicated little self. If I could harness just a fraction of the patience, tolerance and love that I feel for Princess towards human beings, I know I could move mountains. For some reason, I am unable to really do the same completely with human beings. I am frustrated and impatient with society and the world, but not with animals. I am completely and totally at peace when animals are involved and I think I have more clarity as well. Is it possible that they are giving me this as a gift, I don't know, maybe.

My love story is about the animals. It's my whole life. I have been privileged to share my life with them, so far, for almost all my years on Earth. I cannot imagine a day without animals around me. Without animals in the world, things wouldn't mean the same to me, I wouldn't work as hard as I do to make the world better, and I might be a very hopeless person. Instead, everyday I receive a gift of love, hope, compassion, joy, laughter, sometimes pain and so much more, all from the animals.

I think if there ever was a worthy love, and worthy story, in my life, its only because of the animals.

Happy Valentines Day.

PS: to the other happy vegan, my dear one, yes I love you too... but I also know you understand me about the animals. For that I love you.

Peri the Pirate

Welcome to 2015, and my first post of the year.

Peri, Pirate Style.

Peri, Pirate Style, courtesy of Panda With Cookie on Etsy!

This entry is about Peri. I've waited quite a while to write about this because I wanted to make sure everything would turn out ok. Since I'm now writing, you can keep reading because it means everything is ok. It's been a long road.

Peri has had 2 major surgeries in the last few months. We noticed something was amiss and took him for consultation with our wonderful veterinary group. Upon exam and labs, we learned what it was, and it was very serious. We had decisions to make, including surgery as an option. Removal of 1 eye was recommended. We thought we'd go for the seeming less invasive choice first which was indeed major surgery but not eye removal.

The first surgery was not a success. The disease was still with him after that surgery, and due to other issues, he was no longer able to fully close his eye. We were advised to give him some time to heal as  hopefully he would be able to close the eye in due course. But, in the interim....

The interim was horrible. He needed several kinds of drops everyday, was on medication to stop any possible infection and forced to wear a cone of bravery, for days and then weeks. We would take that blasted cone off, he hated it so much, and let him rest with us without it as much as possible. But we could not leave him unattended for even a moment without it. After a few weeks, he had about 3 good days, and then bam.... things took an even bigger turn for the worse. He got an ulcerated eye, and that meant even more different kinds of drops and creams.

It was torture, he hated the drops, hated the medication, hated the cone, and of course he ultimately became extremely depressed. It was an awful time. Don't ever think for a moment that it's untrue when I say either of us happy vegans would have traded places with Peri to take his pain away and make him whole. We love him that much. That is what you do for family, but it's not physically possible. If we could've, we would've.

All through this time, we were shuttling him back and forth for follow ups, and even a few house calls were made by our wonderful vets as well. We are so lucky to have Marathon Veterinary Hospital as the professionals for our companion animals.

We had to decide what to do. He had disease remaining, he had an eye that was not functioning due to ulceration, he was in pain and he was depressed.

This decision may seem easy to someone reading this, but trust us, it was a very difficult decision. With guidance from Peri's doctors, we made the decision to move ahead for another surgery to have the eye removed. Back to the hospital, inpatient.

Peri had his surgery and it went incredibly well. We got the pathology back, and he has no disease remaining, they got it all. He had a few difficult days with a few things that required a trip back up and resuturing after the first round of stitches were removed, but after that last round of sutures and coning, he is reborn. All sutures are out, the cone is forever gone, and his fur is even mostly grown in. He is playing, eating, running, jumping. He is sleeping in the sun, he is taking his walks outside on the leash, he is allowing the others to finally groom him again, and he is following us wherever we go demanding his treats, soy milk and hugs.

Peri is back to being the Mayor of Deer Run.

This post doesn't talk about the realities of what we went through for the last few months with him, but he endured a lot. We were with him every step of the way with excellent medical care making the best decisions we thought at every step. We're very sorry he has had to have an eye removed, but as Dr. Mader said "animals are extremely adaptable." And, yes they are. Doctor told us that the surgery to remove the eye would be less difficult for Peri than the initial surgery to save the eye, and indeed he was right about that too. It just seemed like the right thing to do and try to save the vision, save the eye.

On a happy side note.... While Peri was in recovery, I was trolling the internet one day and came upon "Panda With Cookie" which is an AWESOME craft site that makes awesome cruelty free, vegan felted items, including CUSTOMIZED ANIMAL ORNAMENTS!!! With a few clicks of the mouse, and a few emails back and forth, we were amazed that a little vegan felted customized Peri ornament showed up in our mailbox just before Christmas. As you may (or may not) recall, I don't celebrate Christmas, but the other happy vegan does. This year, he was not in spirit with Peri's situation, and didn't even want a tree. Then, magically when the Peri ornament arrived, he was up in the attic rummaging for the little tree we keep, throwing on some lights, (organic!) candy canes, and 1 single ornament.... the little Pirate Peri. The tree was complete, the house seemed happier, and Peri was happy to check the tree (and his artsy version!) out every day like clockwork.

Peri is fine. We're searching for a teeny tiny patch to see how he'll like it, because every pirate rightfully has either a patch or a peg leg. Peri's fur has grown in so the peg leg is gone, so the patch it is!

Peri, sweet Peri. Our little pirate, our sweet sweet pirate.

To The Curb!

2014 that is.... kicking it to the curb in just a few hours. No looking back, like it or not, another year done, with a bright shiny new year barreling through.

My year in review isn't worth reviewing really. I won't bore you with a long jazzy post. Things here were pretty good, the animals are pretty healthy (more to come on that in a few days), and our family grew by 1 this year with the arrival of Princess Glitter FancyPants back in March. I think of all things that happened this year, that was probably in the top 2 of life changing events. It's not just because of her circumstances (someone threw her away, just threw her away like garbage out here on Long Beach), but more because of how her arrival has stirred in me the "no holds barred" feeling I have more than ever when it comes to advocating for animals. We open our home to people, that's our business sure it is, but animals come before even ourselves here.

Princess Glitter FancyPants is not a throwaway. No animal is a throwaway. Every animal is precious, every animal feels pain, joy, grief, and love. When I look at Princess I see in her everything that is wrong with humanity, in general in our callous nature, our disregard for others, and our casual outlook on animals being nothing. But, when I look at Princess I see in her everything that is right with humanity by considering that she has now has a home that probably is among the best for her in the Universe....she has love, shelter, medical care and joy in her life. She has created so much love within others as they follow her on line, and so much unity in so many people as well.

It's the give and take I have such trouble with in the world, that push/pull. Why push, why pull. How about just living with compassion, no more push/pull. No more arguing, no more violence, no more stupid bacon jokes, no more ego.

I have no idea what the upcoming year has in store for me or anyone else. Regardless, I have hope. I have hope for a good year, a hope for a compassionate future for the world, and finally a hope that all animals will get the justice and life they truly deserve in this world.

Happy Vegan New Year.

Princess, before she was Princess.
Photographed when I found her, before she rescued me.

Merry Christmas, if that's your thing

I haven't been around the blog much lately, apologies for that. The business went back into our busy season, I launched my vegan baking on line and you know just life in general.

Today is Christmas Day, although as I write the day is almost over. This is not a holiday I celebrate any more, although in the past I certainly did, and at various times in my life I embraced this day wholeheartedly.

Things change.

Last night I spent a while setting up my circle and altar for a little ceremony I like to do every Christmas Eve. This is a time of year when I have suffered great loss. When you lose someone you love around any holiday, it seems to amplify that loss. The passage of time doesn't do much to ease any losses for me. I've taken to doing a remembrance ceremony on the Eve of Christmas because it's a night that used to be filled with fun and laughter. I have great memories, and I want to honor those memories. So now I spend my day gathering herbs, rocks, flags, incense, crystals, candles and other objects, along with a list of names. Last night I set up on the enclosed porch because the forecast was not good. Indeed we got heavy rains last night.

Peri parked himself in the middle of things last night.
He is a masterpiece.

I did my best not to end up in a constant pity party of sadness this season. Three times we went into town (Key West and Marathon) with our best holiday spirit put forward and did random acts of kindness of various degrees. The first effort didn't go so well, we were both disheartened, but thank goodness we got back on the effort and took 2 more cracks at that... well worth the effort. The cure for any personal sadness I tend to have is to do something nice for others.

Mission accomplished.

On the food front, I baked thousands of cookies this season. My website went live a couple weeks before Christmas, and it's still a work in progress. I did it myself, things didn't go as planned with the host I planned to design the site, so for now it will do. I did a holiday fair as well, and that went great, but not as planned either. My display was designed for outside, but it was too warm. I was moved inside, which meant my positivity buoy display didn't get set up, and unfortunately my entire display case bit the dust when my table collapsed during set up. Yes I was upset, but no use crying over spilled soy milk. I was lucky I hadn't yet filled the case with my products, so I'll take that as the silver lining. No plans to do any more off site vendor events for a while, I learned my lesson. I did, however, sell lots of products, and raised a decent amount of money for charities with my art. I got back into my art, just a little bit. You might remember that I collect buoys and other trash off the beach during my beach cleaning seasons and recycle what I can into art. The buoys are a scourge on the planet. They are Styrofoam, which never really goes away. It just breaks apart into small pieces which means even more animals can eat that crap, suffer and die. To take them off the beach is a relief, although I cannot tell you how many pieces of foam I pick up on any given day ranging from larger chunks to the teensiest tiniest pieces you can imagine.

Our poor planet.

Some of my positivity buoys.
Buoys wash in as litter.
They're horrible. They're made of foam.
They break down into smaller pieces.
Animals eat them, get sick, suffer & die.
I retrieve them as I find them, clean them, and paint them
with positive sayings.
Then I sell them and give the money to animal charities.

I baked a lot this season, and there certainly is a learning curve in testing my limits. Typically if there's something I want, I get it by working for it, there are simply no limits to what I am capable of, basically I'm not doing brain surgery so I don't accept defeat. The baking tested my limits in more ways than one. It was a marathon not a sprint. I have no idea what the future will hold longer term for that part of my life, but at least for now I have a much better understanding of what I am capable of. I learned yes, I do have limits.

I speak with Pop relatively regularly. It's hard to talk on the phone with him, he has some difficulty hearing on the phone, but we get by. He is happy to be with family and so well cared for. He does, however, miss the Keys terribly. He tells me almost every time we speak that when he looks out the window from his new digs (it overlooks a courtyard) that what he sees is his fountain, Key deer, the ibis, and the Bight. One day he called the other happy vegan and asked him to blast the air horn on his golf cart. The other happy vegan was actually at his house at that moment, so he ran out to the cart, held up the phone and blasted a super long air horn "hello you rascal" on Pop's cart. Pop loved that so much.

We miss him.

I feel that 2015 will be a year of more change. Every year more and more things change, and I have to adapt. Change is not my thing, instead I'm a creature of habit. Oddly enough, I absolutely am at my best under pressure, but that's not to say I enjoy being under pressure. Just as I can say I am quite capable of adapting to circumstances, I don't particularly enjoy having to constantly shift gears and adapt.

It is what it is though.

The other happy vegan shot some video of the cats with their toys this morning. Unfortunately he's notorious for shooting videos for me, and not uploading them. Such is the case with the cats and their toys. You'll have to settle for a photo......

That's Lemon in the front, Luciana in the middle, and way back there
that's Princess Glitter FancyPants.

Peri, Agatha Rain and Pink Moon were busy destroying their toys
in a different spot.

Angel got a giant new toy. She hates new things, but she'll get used to it...
eventually.
Then she'll have fun with it.

Today I took things pretty easy. I made ravioli with arribiata sauce. I used the recipes out of Chloe's Italian Kitchen. Truth be told the dough recipe from the Vegg is the BEST pasta dough I've had, and I prefer working with that recipe. I am out of Vegg right now, so I went with Chloe's. Her cookbooks are really good, I think they're wonderful for people crossing over as new vegans. They typically require no special skill sets and no special ingredients. So, we had the ravioli, and I made her tiramisu. That was tasty as well, and the biggest bonus is the time to prepare is about 30 minutes compared to my own recipe which takes 3 days (yes THREE DAYS) to prepare from start to finish. I ate dough, sugar, and drank caffeine today, but all those leftovers go out the door to others tomorrow, this was a 1 day thing for both of us here.

I managed to keep a fairly routine workout schedule during the December madness, consider that a Christmas miracle perhaps. It's about prioritizing what really matters, and there's no putting off anymore that health and fitness comes first, thank goodness I've had a few decades of putting health and fitness first. The other happy vegan has come over to the health and fitness side of things over the last few months, and just as it was when he finally went vegan, this too has brought much more harmony into our lives. He is much more appreciative of my cooking efforts now, and I am much more thankful I no longer have to dodge the junk food in the pantry or freezer anymore. Being vegan is great, but be careful not to go down the slippery slope of a junk food vegan. 

It's also the time of year when I take stock of my accomplishments, my failures, and reformulate the next "to do" list for my life. I'm not alone in being contemplative at this time of year, I realize that. So, for those of you who ARE thinking "what comes next" how about this.... take it vegan. Yup, take it vegan!

Ok, this post isn't as prophetic as maybe some of my others, but the job is done, and I've filled the page for you. The month of December was fast and furious in my world, and this blog post is me at the end of my rope, without a knot at the end.

See you next time. Eventually!

Merry Merry if that's your thing.

xo

Happy ThanksLiving

Organic raw vegan pumpkin pie
Organic raw vegan thick sweet cashew cream
NOM!

Happy ThanksLiving to each and every one of you observing this magnificent day! Here in the Keys we had a cool day full of blazing sunshine, and VERY brisk winds to clear the cobwebs from even the most hidden nook and cranny. The bay side was exceptionally windy and cool (right where I run), while the oceanside was calm and warm (perfect place to sit in a chair and have a beverage).

I had today "off" for the first time in ten years. I've been told that I'm "lucky," that I have the "most perfect" life, that I'm living the life some people want to live, and more. It startles me that people say those things, or think those things. Trust me, sacrifices have been made, there has been a price to pay, and it is not perfect. Despite the trade off  I'm right where I belong, doing what I should be doing. For now.

I thought about a lot of things today, but didn't do too much. I slept until 8am, caught up on newspapers from when I was gone, spent some time with the cats, and did some cleaning. I went for a run, made a couple phone calls, and took inventory of my kitchen to submit a bulk order to one of our suppliers later tonight.

Dinner was not quite an afterthought, but here it's just not a super decorated, big huge solid week of cooking, no not at all. I made an organic vegan (of course) raw pumpkin pie (from the Present Moment Cafe Cookbook, woot!) with my organic vegan sweet thick vanilla cashew cream. I tossed together a massaged kale salad, roasted some veggies, and plopped bagged organic vegan "dressing" into a pan with some olive oil and poof, instant dressing. I stirred up some organic vegan brown gravy, unwrapped a Field Roast en croute, roasted that, and then looked up a recipe for cranberry sauce. The magical PPK site again saved the day with their perfect 3-ingredient cranberry sauce.

Our table was simple, with a couple candles, and a beautiful piece of fossilized coral that Pop gave to me quite a while ago. I wanted something representing him on our table. When all was said and done, we two happy vegans sat down together, toasted with some (vegan) wine, and ate. Princess paced across the floor trying to figure out how to get onto the table, while Peri snoozed nearby.

My Facebook feed was littered with photos of carcasses and dead throughout the day, but on a bright spot, I know for a fact that there was more than 1 friend who specifically did not post photos of their dead things as a nod to my anguish. I have gratitude for that, although I'd be more thankful if they'd simply take it vegan, you know?

Essentially this was a perfect day here, whatever perfect is anymore. I had a pretty long list of things "to do," which did not get accomplished. Ask me if I care. No, I don't.

I have great abundance in my life, and yes it has come at a price. I have very few, if any, regrets, and for now that's a good place to be in. I hope that you had a blessed day no matter where you are, and whether you celebrate this American holiday. In this country, tomorrow is "Black Friday" which I do my best to avoid, and consider almost obscene. For me, tomorrow I work, I run, and I will again give thanks for the abundance in my life.

I hope you had a compassionate plate, and peace in your heart.

ROAD TRIP! POP!

So many of us are still adjusting to Pop having moved, including Pop himself. It seems like yesterday he was here, yet forever that he's moved. How's that all possible I have no idea, but it is what it is.

On relatively short notice, we had personal reasons to go up to mainland Florida. As long as we were headed up, we sort of figured, why not make a road trip to see Pop….. what's a few extra hundred miles between friends?

On a recent morning, I got up extra early and made a couple batches of muffins and some cookies for Pop, wrapped them individually (of course in my biodegradable compostable bags) for Pop's freezer, piled them into a large bakery box, then hastily tossed some mismatched semi-warm clothing into a case. Immediately after checkouts we headed up to the mainland for our personal business. After that was all said and done, Part B of the road trip began, off to see Pop.

Note: NO food was packed or prepared for ourselves on the road due to severe time constraints. This was unfortunate, and a VERY bad move.

After completing said personal business on the mainland, we got driving from Point A on the way to see Pop about 8:45pm that evening. Food was on our minds, as there had been VERY little of that for us the entire day. Being that it was so late, we could find nothing…. until we saw a Panera sign, YAY, or so we thought. Driving up to Panera at 9:06pm, the lock clicked on the door from the inside as they closed at 9pm. 

*#%@#(*

The road trip continued. Still no food.

We drove looking for anything open, anything at all, with no luck. Finally, we found a Winn Dixie. With 5 minutes to spare before they closed at 10pm we burst into the store like mad demons. We managed to grab some peanut butter, jelly, pitas and a bag of rice chips before they closed. As I sat in the back seat of the car hastily slathering peanut butter on a pita, doing my best not to drop jelly onto the carpeting, I actually considered shooting a video for you. Hunger won out, you got no video, but I got a PBJ pita.

We drove until 3am, crashed for a few hours at a hotel and then hit the road again.

We drove straight through for about another 8 hours (rain, rain, rain and more rain) with nothing but PJB pitas to sustain us. All we had on our minds was getting to Pop at a decent hour.

We arrived at his new location just before 5pm. We parked, grabbed the muffins and a couple other items we had brought for him from his house to surprise him, and made a beeline for his apartment. The door was open….. just like the Keys! I heard some laughter drifting out into the hallway, and then the familiar "come oooooooooo in!"

Poof, there he was!

Surrounded by his son, a grandson and his grandson's wife, we entered the apartment. I honestly thought I could hold my composure. I was wrong. Huge hugs were exchanged, and I just held him so tight. He did the same to me. Kisses. Kind words. Hug. Hug. Hug. Tears. Happy HAPPY tears.

He showed us around his new apartment. He has a nice full kitchen where his food is stashed, and his food is prepared. He has a huge closet, with his clothing labeled by day, and a couple warm sweaters tucked in. He has a full living room with a big TV so he can watch his usual programs despite his failing eyesight. He has a cute little alcove off his bedroom which he has set up just like his space in the Keys…. table, chairs, pencil cup & note pad, pictures of family, his little "golf man" all of which is next to 3 large windows overlooking a garden courtyard.

Tears, tears, happy tears.

His grandson has found the local library for him, and is bringing him his large print western books. His Bible is tucked by his bedside, and he has photos of the family through the space.

Tears, tears, happy tears.

We sat and talked. Then talked more, and more and more. We talked about the Keys, we talked about life up there. We talked about family, we talked about sports. We talked about food. We talked about his recipes, and he was tickled I'm veganized his baking recipes one by one (starting with his famous shoo fly pie, as you already know!) He wanted to know how his house was ("perfect Pop, it's just perfect" and yes, it really is). We talked about the ocean. We talked about the water, we talked about the sky. We talked about clothing, we talked about music. We talked about next year's birthday stickers (yes, he's doing them!), and talked about the chocolate cake I will make for his 106th birthday and promised to deliver.

Tears, tears, happy tears. I couldn't stop.

I asked if we were overstaying our welcome (he IS 105, and it was NOT early morning!) and he replied "NO WAY, are you KIDDING me?! All the way from BIG PINE KEY?!!!" 

We made a little list of things we want to send him to make it more like it was in the Keys for him (he likes a calendar on his table…. he is very religious so I asked about a particular cross on his wall "oh yes! I'd love that!"…) and I announced I'm putting him on a "baking schedule" so he will get a small box of my baked goods at least once a month that he can have as snacks, just like it was here ("oh, THANK YOU!")

He kept saying how thankful he was for us coming up to see him. Tears, tears, happy tears.

When I think about what feeds my soul, moments like that visit are what does it for me. 100% pure feeding of the soul.

I didn't take a single picture, not one. Honestly the visit was so full of raw emotion it wasn't really meant for photos, instead it was meant for memories. Memories accomplished.

We all knew we had to go. The time we spent with him were some VERY great hours. He was talkative, engaged fully, and happy. He misses the Keys, we talked about that too. I honestly think that it was hugely important for him to hear about the SO very many people who are asking about him, who miss him, and care dearly for him even though he's far away. That's a really long list, and we didn't miss anyone (hopefully) all the way to the cashier at Publix who asked me a couple weeks ago why I didn't have the "special order" I usually do for "the sweet man you shop for." We promised we'd be back to visit, and we mean it.

Part of me thinks that when I saw him getting on to the airplane in Key West it would be the last time I'd ever see him. He's 105, and hundreds of miles away… we run a business that doesn't really stop, and have no employees to speak of. There's not many opportunities to "run away from home" and do a spur of the moment road trip, no matter how badly we want to.

Universe brings what we need. Universe feeds our soul.

We kissed goodbye. We hugged mad crazy. I cried and told him how I didn't want to leave, but promised we'll be back. He knows its true, but he needed to hear it anyway.

Pop has a message for all of you out there who love him…. "thank you, I love you." His exact words.

The other happy vegan's parting words were "see you soon you rascal!" which Pop shot right back "I love you, you rascal!" and my parting words were simply "I love you."

Close your eyes. Can you see Pop in a vivid color golf shirt, with his trademark smile? Can you hear his voice "you rascal!!!!!" "keep on keeping on!" "I love you SO much!" I hear him. I see him. I hope you can too.

He's still adjusting, and needs more things to fill his days. Remember… here in the Keys, he had golf matches twice weekly, laundry day, his golf cart where he'd sit outside for hours every morning waving to passersby and talking with anyone who'd stop, and more. It's all still new for him, and 105 is a remarkable age to consider reinventing yourself, no?

Whatever the future holds, he knows we're still connected, and we know we're still connected. We're drained emotionally, sad, and strangely satisfied.

Mission accomplished, you rascal.